He and his drama

Assalamualaikum.

I donno is it my fault or not.
Or he always memang camtu. Dengan those drama.
Dan again, we don't talked anymore.
Great.

... Last two days, my colleague tak dapat buat oncall. Kesian dia, sakit. Cepat baik yer!
And someone yang rajin buat oncall, he can't do it on that day.
So, he asked for my help.
And we discussed and I volunteered to do it. Ikhlas sangat time tu. Tak ada keraguan.
Betul-betul ikhlas. Ok.

Time diorang asked for my help is around 1130. Duty start at 1200 pm.
Nak balik rumah jap nak ambil barang pon serba salah. And malas. Nasib ada spare banyak inside my locker.
Then tiba-tiba teringat I don't have any foods untuk berbuka.
My friend suggest soh gi ordered cepat dengan dia.
She said menu hari tuh ialah some crab with pau or rice things.
And I agree. And i ambil nasi with crab.
You remember this.
Nasi with crab.

Tak lama pastu, my friend from different department whatsapp me. Dia nak set date untuk buka sama. And after few chat. Kami dah capai kata sepakat.
And you know what, rupanya dia pon oncall jugak time tu.
And i said, tolong hantar some lauk buka sikit. Sebab she said her father akan hantar nanti petang.
Ngecek sikit jer.
I just want lauk jer. Dia pon tak kisah.
Alhamdulillah.

Sebab my plan ialah... rice with crab yang i ordered. I will paid macam biasa.
But i just took the nasi and tukar dia punya lauk.
Lauk from my friend tuh.
Crab tu plak. Just bagi la kat anyone yang nak, kan. Siapa tak nak chilies crab meals yang gojes meliur tuh.

Because i can take risk makan crab time oncall. Mau allergic, siapa baik hati nak tolong cover?
Ubat pon hanya ada kat rumah.
Big no duh.

And masa tengah update, pindah-pindah set untuk kes on the next day. Dia datang to me.
He said, he got a problem with the menu list. Some changes lah.
Nak tukar my nasi with pau.
Time tu teringat balik that my friend cakap mak dia masak ikan goreng sort of thing.
Imagine. Ikan goreng dan pau.
I just can smile to myself.
And i said, tak pe. I don't mind. I just paid. Tak ada food, pon takpe.
Tak kisah.

Even rasa nak menangis pon ada.

Pastu dia pon cakaplah, tak akan dia nak makan two set plak.
Thats my set. And i should take it.
Ceh, bukan dia ni jenis kaki makan before ke? Rasa bersalah lah tu.
And whatever it is, i ulang banyak kali... i said. Tak pe. I really tak kisah. Dia nak bagi pau with crab. Tak kisah.
I don't mind.
Kalau tak bagi that food pon takpe.
Yelah, ada pernah nampak orang makan pau kosong dengan ikan goreng?

Then, after few minutes.
I terus terang cakap, that actually i dah ada my own lauk buka puasa.
Which I really don't want to tell to anyone. Includes him.
Bila i said like that, dia terus silent and nak blah daripada situ.

Which i don't aspect dia kan response cam tu.
I tried to catch him. Grab that blue scrub suit. You know, but he's stronger than me.
And he said, lain kali tak payah order dengan dia. Menyusahkan. 

And the door is broken.

I just kept pandang that door.
Until my friend nak bukak pintu ambil barang.
Pastu pintu tak boleh bukak.
And we pull and push, and i repaired it myself. Because I'm the one responsible to it. Nak harapkan budak tu? Huh.

Nasib after few attempt, pintu tu da ok balik. Seriau gak.
My friend pandang pelik. Dah kenapa tanya dia.
Gaduh. I said. Cam biasa.

After i finished my task, i terus sent message my friend cakap i need a nasik with that lauk.
Sorry susahkan parents dia.

Nanti i paid.
And my friend, cakap, it's ok.
Nasib baik.

Love you lah, kawan.

I donno about my level of puasa  that day.
But Alhamdulillah i can still cool with those things.
And sebabkan kami sama oncall and I surely rasa that he doesn't want to see me. Bayang-bayang pon tak lah. Positive.
Then,
I spent my time dengan solat terawih and lots of recited Quran that night.
Lagi best.

Lagi best lagi, rasa macam malas nak tidur situ je. 

Tapi fikir not comfortable, tidur la atas sofa. 

Actually I don't like this kind of fight. 

Nak gaduh pon tak guna. Even rasa nak tumbuk je muka dia. 

But nak twist plot apa lagi la kan. Memang dah benda nak jadi.

Is it my fault? Yang i got my own lauk?
Should I cancelled at the first place, suruh my friend tak payah hantar?
And mostly, do i nih menyusahkan dia?
Kenapa dia camtu ek?

And fine, i will remember dia punya words. Jangan ordered anything from him.
Yeah pasti.

And most welcome sebabkan think that i burden you.

Baru sedar. 

Huhuhuuu.... I missed my family!

Anyway I will not gonna explain all this nonsense things to him.
Biarlah dia fikir camtu. I'm ok with it.
Believe me, i never simpan dendam to anyone. Or anything.
Just be matured. Be happy.
We don't know what time Allah will call me, you. 

Us to face Him.

Should i paid for that crab things? and Nak minta maaf if this is my fault? 

Perlu ke?

Anyway. Raya just around the corner

Selamat berpuasa. =)

Talked about my hijab ,my style

Assalamualaikum.

Ramai yang tak puas hati with my style, sebab i prefer wore something yang loose.
Yang boleh muat another one two people in it.
Pastu dengan kain yang meleret since dulu.
That i still young, why not enjoy my life and wild.
Bla.bla.bla.

I just okay with it.
Diorang nak cakap belakang, or i'm too Islamic much or whatever.
Like i cares?
Wrong person duh.
Sebab i tak pernah said anything about what they wore,
Not a bad things to it.
So why they like judging my clothes?

Come, i beritahu a bit what i want to sampaikan. Read carefully.
I don't like my curvy body. Each of it.
I don't even want to show it to any of you. No one. None.
And my long kain is because i don't like wore socks.
That's why i make it long and meleret.
To cover my feet.

Can you leave me alone?
Please.
You're not benefit at all to me.
Bad parasite.

But if it something useful to me. You can judge me.
Like one day i just wore my simple ootd.
With a long sea blue skirt and grey sweater and sneaker with navy blue scarf.
And in a lift, my colleague tegur me.
That i look so fine and why not tried labuhkan my scarf.
And i just smiled to him.

He said something right duh. This is a good judgement.
I memang terasa, rasa nak tumbuk je dia, but in positive way i respect him.
Thank you there.

That this is one thing yang dah lama i nak change. In my style.
Is it it is the right time.
Ramadan zone?
InsyaAllah.

Soemetimes, we don't understand what people think.
What they're going through.
What we're going through is totally different.
Just be a someone good in soeone life.
Stop judging.
If you can't praised it.

Korea atau tidak?

Assalamualaikum.

My friend ada invite me gih join rombongan Cik Kiah ke Korea.
Next year, 2018 bulan August.
I said, on jela. But after beberapa days kebelakangan ini, which I'm not sure it's a good decision or not.
As my big project is early next year too.
Hurm. Walaupun jarak dia jauh, but still... still kena pertimbangkannya.
What should i do?

Korea is not in my bucket list to travel. Even diorang cakap best la ke apa.
Sebab I'm not fan of any Korean things.
Running man jelah i tahu.
Makanan diorang?
Lagilah out. 

Fikir-fikir, daripada Korea baik pergi Jepun. Islam kat sana lagi banyak.
Easy sikit nak dapat makanan.
And orangnya more courtesy gitu.

Pastu sambung fikir. Daripada gih Japan, why not travel to other Islamic region.
Middle east ke contohnya.
...  Iran is one yang most wanted place nak gih. Hah yang ni baru lah excited nak pack barang.Sebab sana Islam is major and just different in the Syiah things.

Mostly i think they are loveable.
And they're not what international news talked about.
Beza sangat. 

Palestine, Syria, Kuwait, Dubai, Turkey, Morocco and so on. Pon cam best.

Selain middle east, ada gak dream tempat mahal sikit macam Norway. Layan Faroe Island, or tour Europe ker kan.
Heheheee...
Banyak sangat berangan nih.
Siapa nak sponsored?

BTW, Korea or not?
...
Not sure deh.

But i think it's a no.

How nak cakap kat dia ek?

Lallalalaa...

And bila dah cacelled yang tu. 

Who's gonna be my travel partner in future? Nak travel solo, not in million years sebab pompuan kan. Mau kena culik? 

Of course if one day i do that, my emak and ayah will halang kat airport.

Nak buat drama leleh air mata ker kat sana?

Sebab diorang tahu i nih jenis gila sometime. Walau sempoi mana pon.

Suka ikut rasa hati sendiri. Sometimes degil banyak. They worried much about me.

And mostly i will not travel to the city and be in crowded place. Not ok.

But i will treasure their culture and art. Countryside yang boleh bring me closere to them.

And phenomena yang indah that will be capture in my new camera, one day duh.

Yeah.

One fine day.

Jom?